let’s dive into something I absolutely cherish: my alone time. I’m talking about those deep, introspective monologues I have with myself. They’re honestly more profound than any of the daily chit-chat I have with others. That’s exactly why I adore the peace and quiet of my own space. No buzzing background noise, no distractions – just me, myself, and I.


You see, most people peg me as the loud, animated social butterfly, always buzzing from one place to another. There was a time when I’d come home and immediately hit the power button on my TV, craving that background noise like a lifeline. But here’s the twist – one day, while driving and wrestling with directions, I caught myself turning off all the background sound just so I could concentrate. That got me thinking: do I need complete silence to sort through my thoughts?

This realization made me curious. If silence is my brain’s go-to for clear thinking, why was I constantly filling my space with noise for ‘comfort’? What was I trying to drown out from my own mind using this ‘outside noise’? It dawned on me that maybe, just maybe, I was subconsciously blocking out something in my mind without even realizing it.

What were they, these thoughts and feelings I was running away from? Turns out, I was stuck in a cycle of self-distraction, a habit I picked up at a young age to avoid dealing with my emotions. I learned to sleep it off, forget things, and ‘let it go’ – mimicking what I saw growing up. So, all those bottled-up thoughts and emotions – my own Pandora’s box – were what I’d been subconsciously suppressing.

Think about it: what is so loud in your head that you need louder and faster beats from the outside to override it for comfort? I’ve often pondered whether those who listen to heavy metal, with its screaming, intense emotions, might have a lot of pent-up anger and turmoil that they soothe with music that matches their internal chaos. The same goes for folks who unwind with dark crime shows before bed. And what about those who need background music ‘TO FOCUS’? Just me being curious – no judgment, just wondering!


Interestingly, the more I discovered and fell in love with myself through facing my unresolved pains, the calmer my mind became. The need for those ‘noises’ faded away. My mind isn’t something I run from anymore.


So, what type of music do you listen to? Does it change with your mood? Are you someone who needs distractions to switch off your mind at the moment? If so, from a place of love, I ask: what are you running away from?

By Janzye

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